Perspectives 10:37pm

I love the feeling of being wanted. And having someone finally want to spend time with me. We have shared 3 weeks in a row. Apartment hunting,Isaacs, 8below. Emailing and calling throughout the week. The weekend of finding our way to Ruby Tuesdays, apartment looking and Fantastic4 and homemade yummy Apple pear crisp and a surprise trip to Suunewalds. WOW, he really pays attention to what I say. Friends is what we are. Although I want more. I know it may not be possible. Only by a miracle could we make this work. I would like for it to work. I miss him this weekend. We both had things we needed to do. I miss him even though we email and talk on the phone. I do want to be there. He's lovely, he really is lovely. I haven't seen him since Sunday want to hear his voice. He knows I am needy which is why I have not made a phonecall. I want to be with him so much.

I opened the pond today, I watched the fish appear one at a time and then had the blessed priveledge of watching a frog find his way to the surface. I feel like the frog waiting for someone to pull the cover off and waiting to see what's on the surface. Waiting for the first breathes of air. Waiting to see if some ones going to be there. Pushing my way to the top, finally to the top in hopes that something good is finally waiting for me. Maybe the surface is cleared away of the debry? Maybe all those things that seemingly hang overhead will easily be pushed away? Aahh if the fish and frogs have survived through the winter and bitter cold perhaps I can survive also. And we can all make it through the obstacles that loom ahead. I believe with him. He can be whole and we can make it together. Where ever it is we are going. Hopefully we can be together this week and weekend. I can't believe I miss him so much.
good night